Top Worst Ways To Remove Tattoos

 

We’re not going to judge you here. It’s not every day you lose a bet during a drunken holiday in Mexico, or somewhere like that, that results in a tattoo placed somewhere on your body. We’re okay with that. But you probably never really thought about the implications of that badly placed – and very likely poorly done – ink job when years later words like engagement, marriage and children started to form part of your vocabulary. You know, she wants it gone. Tattooing overtop of it is not an option and well, since you fancy yourself as a bit of a DIY kind of guy, you figure you can take matters in your own hands and erase that bad piece of art over the weekend.

So, with that in mind, let us share with you our list of the top worst ways to remove a tattoo.

1 – The Power Sander

Hey, we get it. This little bundle of super-charged energy can do a bitchin’ job of stripping varnish off of anything that has a few coats on it. It did a particularly inspired treatment to the wooden chair you thought you could refinish. However, once you dropped the power sander on it at warp speed, you managed to burn a hole right through the seat of the chair. Sure, it should peel that unwanted tat in the blink of an eye. Oh, be sure to wear safety goggles and a splash shield.

2 – Acid Wash

The concrete driveway was getting a bit on the moss-covered side. So you and a couple of buddies got together and hatched a plan. You would scrub away the moss and clean the driveway with an acid wash. It sounded pretty good on paper. You’ve even seen it done on TV on one of those insanely popular renovation programs like “Home Improvement” only when you did it the bubbling eventually quit. That’ll sear that tat off quickly. It’ll sting for just a little while.

3 – Flame Thrower

Maybe you’re a fan of a really good barbecue. You know, properly singed on all sides with a nice, juicy center. There’s nothing in the Rule Book that says you can’t at least attempt to use a tiger torch or flame throwing apparatus of any description at that unwanted tattoo. The only hitch is that at a certain temperature – and you’ll have to figure that part out with some trial and error – your skin is going to bubble and well, scar a bit more than it did when that tat was applied.

4 – Cheese Grater/Peeler

You know how great a job these tools do on basically changing the form of the average chunk of cheese into a whole different form of cheese. They are thorough and, provided they remain as sharp as possible, they get the job done swiftly without a lot of effort. However, dragging either of these across the surface of your skin will have a far different effect than that twin blade razor you use each morning. You will be able to remove that tattoo but also a few layers of skin.

5 – Denture Cleaner

You know the routine. You just drop a couple of tablets in water and the scrubbing action of the tiny bubbles shake, rattle and roll stains and food particles off of false teeth in a matter of minutes. You could try this with a box full of tablets and a bucket of warmish water. Pour in the tablets, soak the body part with the tattoo for up to 15-minutes and presto! All stains will be removed. Tattoos, of course, may be a bit more stubborn than that requiring more tablets.

6 – Sandblasting

You’ve seen it work on construction sites. A well-aimed sandblaster can strip the paint off of a vehicle down to metal and pound the daylights out of most anything else that gets in the way. This has a lot to do with the pressure applied to the sand mixture which basically feels like something burning at the surface that won’t go away until several layers of paint or other material are pulverized. As for using this to rid your ankle or wrist of a tattoo, you have to consider that both of those limbs may be rendered inoperable soon after the pain subsides.

7 – Cat Tongue

You’ve seen how thorough your cat is at grooming. Aside from the occasional hairball, he/she does a great job of keeping that coat shiny, smooth and free of any kind of imperfection. The surface of your cat’s tongue is similar to that of sandpaper and Velcro combined. It rubs and pulls at the same time and with the right bait – catnip is always a go-to in our house – you may be able to have your cat lick away at that tat until it starts to disappear. The redness is normal.

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8 – Professional Tattoo Removal Services

Who knew there was such a thing as a professional tattoo removal service? Well, when you consider that if it did not exist, there’s a high probability that someone would try to remove an unwanted tattoo with one of the kind of dangerous but more on the stupid side methods outlined in this list. So, what we are trying to say is that if you have some ink you no longer wish to have on your body, you have nothing to worry about. There’s no need for a hazmat suit.

Disconnect The Angle Grinder And Give Us A Call

Far be it from us to tell you when a DIY tattoo removal project is beyond your skill set but think about it for a moment. Do you really want your attempt at doing this end up on a ‘Fail Video’ weekend wrap-up? Don’t be that guy. Be the guy who picks up the phone and gets a hold of us to book an appointment to discuss how we can erase the ink without causing harmful side effects, blowing a hole in the ozone or leaving behind more than a scratch. Call us for details today.