Back in 1992, I got a tattoo. Just the outline of two little hearts on my upper arm. Not too tough or scary, kind of on a whim, but nothing I really regretted. Then, in 2005, not long after my youngest daughter was born, and against my better judgment, I got another, much larger and elaborate tattoo, to hide the original, demure tattoo. My husband at the time hated the original tattoo, so naturally, it had to go. I was SUCH an idiot. I should have ignored him!

I hated the new tattoo with a passion. HATED IT. It’s ugly. And I’m really not the arm-band type. So for years I’ve wanted to get rid of it. When I watched “Gladiator,” I no longer drooled over Russell Crowe’s spectacular hotness. I envied the toughness it took for him to scrape off his Roman tattoo, and wondered if my friend sarcastic suggestion of sand-blasting it off was viable. After all, I had survived childbirth. Twice.

I’d heard about laser tattoo removal, but even though I had survived childbirth (twice) I am notoriously wimpy about pain. I loved the idea of getting rid of the tattoo for good, but I was afraid laser treatments would hurt, and even though I did a thorough search of various blogs and Googled until my brain hurt, I couldn’t find a straight answer on how much laser tattoo removal would hurt. But after a week or so of a debate with myself, I decided to muster my courage, find a tattoo removal expert, and give it a go.

I Googled “laser tattoo removal” and “Detroit” and came up with a handful of spas and the like in my neighborhood, and one very promising entry for a medical center, with actual real medical doctors, that specializes in laser tattoo removal. I took a deep breath, dialed, and spoke to a very friendly, very chill sounding receptionist. She gave me a quick run-down on the procedure, the doctors, and the laser, then asked if I had any questions.

“Does it hurt?” I asked, an endless weenie.

She replied immediately. “No,” she said, “we have technology that allows us to numb the area before we use the laser.”

Bingo! I set an appointment for a few days later, bought a tube of Aquaphor to use after the treatment, and imagined how good I’d look in tank tops once the tattoo was gone.

I couldn’t wait for my appointment. I was giddy like a school-girl.